Posts Tagged ‘loss’


She was too old for everything
but this.
Her round form pleasantly
occupying that grey space
between lists of things to do
and things left undone.
She had always been a mother
it seemed,
but not grand, not yet, not in the end.

She was not young enough
for anything else
but filling a church
with people that bracketed her
like a hug.
Always a competitor,
she always had to be first
quipped her older sister.
The congregation laughed
for what seemed like the first time.

And in the back
the monsterĀ on my shoulders
compresses facts
into a history
rather than tragedy.
I feel only my heavy, fleshy body
rather than the damned river
of emotions.
These things, once part of me,
have been labeled symptoms now –
so the word possibility is removed
of its youth and grows into manhood.


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Before the balloon was let go
into the blue infinity
she said goodbye.
Not that the balloon wasn’t beautiful
or fair
but just that it was a balloon
destined to do precisely that.

The park was filled with others
bobbing in the wind
tethered to a parent
flying from tiny grass ledges
toward the blue infinity
but they all rotate around
her – mine.

The expectation of tears
was gravity to me.
Her daily present,
a sign that life is a harvest
of plenty,
was running into something
as it left us with nothing.

My assumption
was that the daily sign
had become the opposite –
a sign that life takes everything –
and so I held her
in silent expectation
as tight as a string tied around a tree.
But she didn’t cry.
She smiled and in a playful whisper
said: “It is free.
Watch it dance.
It it is dancing
for you and me”

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