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Posts Tagged ‘leaving’

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We argued,
as it had become habit,
on whether I was a monster
or a villain.
The custom of being polite
retreats from the presence of intimacy –
the pressure of its implied authenticity
squeezing like an ill fitting brassiere.
Even normal
behavior is a
burden – even the most
joyous human contact
is irritable.
To you this is a game
trying to be played.
Your goal is to have rules –
orderly justice.
But this is a fact,
a brassiere
supporting
but not fitting.
A fact that no intentions
or actions can change –
A monster is sewn into
my DNA
and I refuse to apologize.

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My My

You said words I
never thought you
would say. Like my.
As if to say
you claim an ownership
to this place
this human, human place
above ground, land, and sky.
Above beauty, love, and justice
in the words that compose
the thoughts that consume
any notion of ‘my’.
I thought our face
put us above such things
opposed to such things
by the nature of art
of our human, human training.
To save face
you turn away from the mirror
of painted landscapes
our homeland
in oil and sweat.
The visible brush strokes
in your hair
force a creator,
a human, human creator
to be known.
To stand above it all
and to claim the elegance
of the conquered ‘my’.

I said the word ‘my’
yesterday. And despite
myself, I thought of you,
and that painting of our
homeland.
You said you would take
me to your home. You never did.
I can still feel your
stare stealing my words
on love, on justice, and
our human, human
lives.
Perhaps you realized
as you ran your fingers
through your hair,
that your needs could
not be met.
Perhaps you lied
about your mythological place,
your hidden home,
your human, human creator.

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The sun looks like a woman walking
away. Her pink, orange, and magenta
dress dangling on crisp edged
pavement gray
and children’s colored chalk.
She looks back to think on
why she is flying to California
to bring everything one day closer
to sinking into the sea.

Behind her she drags Apollo’s
broken motorcycle, poet still attached
to the back, kicking and screaming
as her giant steps gracefully
set the United States to time.
Amidst her burning eyes a tear
evaporates for poor Apollo
whom the world thought was in control.

He wants her so bad,
wants to control her
so that he can always
enjoy her day, her light, and the secret
smile she lets nobody else see
when the sun itself laughs at a turn.
She drags him over desert sand
and mountains, and the hilly lands
of the Midwest. His bronze skin
trying to slow her retreat.

The setting sun is a woman
walking away and even as she laughs
at departing words your heart sinks.
One breath says “I want to go”
and “I want to stay”
but you know she’ll be gone
by the time night falls.
She’ll turn to wave a good bye,
and if you’re not Apollo,
you’ll let her go.
Because that means you love her.

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Cait, Wait.

Please, before you go away
Stay, until you can no more.
Ignore whatever I say
Allay your fears and just stay.

I hate your fears
They’re too real sustain
Obtain from me what you must
Then just smile, and remain.

You fit me in your hand
An ocean in your eyes,
the size of a Milky Way –
never mind all my lies.

Tomorrow what will you have left?
Theft of a man too sane to be right.
Bright stars shed no light next to you
Do what you must do tomorrow night
But stay tonight.

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